Steve Minutillo :: messy-78messy things

java.sun.com is promoting something called Project Orion today. I hadn’t heard of it before, so I went to the site to check it out. From the FAQ:

Q: What is Project Orion?

Its a new and innovative initiative that has the potential to change the face of the enterprise software industry by making enterprise infrastructure software predictable in its delivery, more freely accessible for evaluation and even more affordable to purchase. This will be achieved by taking a fresh approach to how enterprise infrastructure software is designed, developed, delivered and deployed.

OK, I now have no idea what Project Orion is. Let’s read a little more:

Q: What are the objectives of Project Orion?

To radically simplify the acquisition, deployment and management of enterprise infrastructure software, relieving customers from the escalating levels of complexity and cost.

Still nothing. As I read further and further on, it became apparent that this has to be some sort of joke:

Q: What are the top three Project Orion objectives to reduce customer cost?

- Through provision of a deployment reference architecture that reduces planning and testing.
- Through pre-integrated and pre-tested enterprise infrastructure software reducing additional integration needs.
- Through simplifying operations for enterprise infrastructure software feature, patch and upgrade needs.

Now wait a minute. Not only does that not make any sense, some of it doesn’t even parse! Did they have an intern write this? Here the document begins to read like a piece of well-crafted totalitarian propoganda, memorized from a very early age:

COMRADE! What are the key customer benefit objectives of Project Orion?

Sir! To reduce complexity and saves time and resource costs!
Sir! To reduce and simplify enterprise infrastructure software project planning and time to deployment!
Sir! To reduces time and simplify enterprise infrastructure software patch, upgrades and day-to-day operations!
Sir! To improve time and accessibility to new features and functionality!
Sir! To accelerate the development and deployment of network services!

Very good, you may carry on.

Maybe at some point this document does contain actual content. Let’s skip to the end:

Q: What is the key takeaway from the Project Orion announcement?

This is a journey to change the face of the enterprise infrastructure software industry. Sun is leveraging it’s world-class competency in developing and releasing large-scale system software through its success with the Solaris Operating System. It’s making enterprise infrastructure software integrated and open; predictable in its delivery; more freely accessible for evaluation; and even more affordable to purchase. Driving complexity down and cost out.

Leaving aside that fact that you should never, ever trust anyone who tells you what “the key takeaway from this” is, and the grating spelling and grammatical errors, it still doesn’t mean anything! The entire FAQ does not, in any way, explain what this Project Orion actually is! It does explain that Project Orion is not a software bundle, that it is better than a best-of-breed solution (nice trick), that it does not target a specific competitor, and that it supercedes SunONE, leverages N1, and goes beyond SunTone. Thanks, that really helps.

I think Steve Ballmer has done a better job explaining what .NET is than this. Idiots.